On The Prowl:

A Feline Purr…spective

PawSense Software  

By Stacy Mantle

A utility program to protect your computer from cyber pet attacks - a must have for pet owners the world over!

When the computer program PawSense was first brought to my attention, I have to admit that I thought it was a joke.  I honestly just assumed that it was one of those elaborate websites put together by some tech guy who had way too much time on his hands and happened to have a cat.  Maybe he was thinking of a funny product that other tech guys could get some use out of, but that no one had invented yet.  The thought even went through my mind that it was a techie contest by tech guys that have nothing better to do because they have essentially conquered the universe. I mean, I have no idea what those guys do for fun.  So – I clicked on the “buy” button to see what would happen. Imagine my surprise when it put me through to a credit card page. 

Then I started thinking; “Well, someone has really put some time in on this, and maybe I should report it as a hoax”.  But before I did something that extreme, I decided to exercise my journalistic responsibility and do some more research by contacting the company.  Imagine my surprise when the owner of the company actually responded!  Exploration of the company seemed eminent at that point, and I saw no option but to give them a fair shot, thereby opting to review their unique and much-needed (at least in my home) product, PawSense.

At this point, I suppose I should describe the product to you.  PawSense is an innovative computer program designed specifically for cat (and dog) owners who use the computer. The main idea of this program is to protect your computer from the hostile intrusions of your four-legged literary companions who are, for some inexplicable reason, drawn to the computer while you are working for the sole purpose of destroying whatever you happen to be working on at that time.  I wish I could tell you how many novels, short stories, columns, and probably Pulitzer Prize winning articles that I have lost due to curious kittens walking across my keyboard.

You might just think that it would be easier to just save your work, and I agree, it probably is.  But truth be told, when you are in the middle of a train of thought (particularly when it is as brilliant as mine), you’re not thinking about saving the document.  I mean, stories about my interesting pets and new, innovative products that are out there on the market for pet owners, and the antics of my “food chain” can cause a lot of undue stress on my thought process:  stress that can stop me from saving information.  Which is where this very unique product comes into play.

PawSense, has the unique ability to sense the difference between your typing and your felines typing.  And when it senses your feline is typing, it automatically stops any further activity from taking place on the computer!  It doesn’t stop when you make a typing error.  It doesn’t stop when you’re in the middle of a thought.  It doesn’t stop just because it feels like stopping.  It stops when it is supposed to stop.

Needless to say, I have fallen in love with this program.  Not only does it halt further feline destruction of a document, it affords disciplinary action.  You see, the program comes complete with a “hissing” sound (as well as several other sounds) that play as soon as the screen goes blank.  This frightens the cat off of the keyboard, and has actually trained my felines to know that they are not welcome on or near my computer.  The result?  No more lost work. 

You can also record your own voice telling your cat to get off the computer.  I don’t really recommend this feature for one main reason:  my cats like to hear my voice.  If they figured out that they could walk across my keyboard and hear my voice any time they wanted, I would have 14 cats on my computer all the time.  Now, if your cat isn’t a big fan of you, then perhaps this is a great feature you will want to employ, but that’s a judgment call you will have to make.

One thing that the average user does not know (and I have to admit that I am an average user) is that Microsoft Windows has over 200 keyboard shortcuts built into its software, and some of these can result in not only a loss of text, but deleted system files, a change of data, and even a complete reconfiguration of your hard drive. (I’ve always said that our cats are a lot smarter than we give them credit for).   However, PawSense is fully aware of each of these shortcuts and has created their program in a way that will thwart even the smartest covert cat operation.

This utility program is not going to use up all of your memory either.  According to the PawSense website, which was written by people who can state this technical information much better than I: “Except while playing a sound (when a cat is detected) PawSense occupies less than 79K of RAM.  Even on a computer with only 16 megabytes of RAM, PawSense uses less than 1/200th of that RAM. PawSense does not use any non-system DLLs such as MFC, VBRUN, etc. that cause some programs to take up too much memory. PawSense uses very little time as well: typically less than 1/1000th of the available CPU time. When your computer is busy PawSense somewhat reduces its CPU usage accordingly. An installation of PawSense takes up less than 2 megabytes of hard drive space. While installing it may temporarily use as much as 4 megabytes of hard drive space.”

In all, at only $29.95, PawSense is a remarkable value.  Offering peace of mind for telecommuters, freelancers, and anyone who has a pet (it even works with dogs, ferrets, and other small creatures!), I wholeheartedly recommend this unique computer protection program against our “animal cyber-terrorists”.  It is important to all of us that we do not allow our pets to learn to use our computer, because it is then that they really will conquer the world, and personally, I don’t want to live in a cat playhouse.  I don’t think I would fit well, and really, my cats can be pretty mean when they set their mind to it.  (I have the scars to prove it).  I don’t want to have medicine forced down my throat with a syringe, and I don’t like eating from bowls.  My life is pretty good, and with few exceptions, I wouldn’t change anything. 

But, just to be on the safe side, I may start catering to my pets a little more (if that’s at all possible). Other than that, I’m keeping PawSense installed on all three of my computer systems, with the speakers left on, for some time to come.  Until the felines of this earth come together, form a union, and learn to hack my computer systems, and then develop the program that will eventually be known as “FurBall 101”, I figure I’m pretty much covered…

Until then – I’m putting my trust in PawSense to stay ahead of the times! 

From the Cats:

Hisses & Spits:  As felines, we have to say this program is terrible!  Our plans for taking over the world have been temporarily thwarted, but we will regroup and come up with an even more terrible plan to take over the universe!  WAAAHHHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Purrs:  Hiss.  Spit…  Where are we supposed to sleep?  Honestly…

From the Humans:

Two opposable thumbs up! Finally!  The answer to my cyber prayers!  Computer protection for my sensitive CPU!  I love this program!   

Drawbacks?  Not a one – I’ve had tremendous success with this program, and after running it for over a month, it makes me wonder how much data I actually have lost…